I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Randomize
