I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
is that a dick in a sweater?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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