If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize