Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
