oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
We had sex on a dog bed..
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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