she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
