No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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