Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
