It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
