Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
