I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
