my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
