Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
