drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize