i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
