So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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