i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
