...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
babies were throwing up all over the place
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize