Cold hands, warm shart.
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
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