Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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