He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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