dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Houston, we have a blender
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I have aggressive nipples.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize