this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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