Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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