i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
