my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.