where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it