Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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