I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
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Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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