Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
