I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
