I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
