I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
my liver is dry heaving
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
