i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
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She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
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The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.