This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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