Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Don't tell me you're on acid again
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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