three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
