Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Still dying that you shit outside
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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