whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
