when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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