Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
