She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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