There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
