Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
