i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
