Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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