She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
