It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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