fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
