It's Friday. Sex?
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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