I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
You pole danced in your parka.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..