Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen http://tfl.nu/31v4
  Replies (20) Good night (2239) Bad night (517) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better http://tfl.nu/apc9
  Replies (3) Good night (687) Bad night (2124) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now http://tfl.nu/fog4
  Replies (9) Good night (3339) Bad night (664) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it. http://tfl.nu/48x8
  Replies (37) Good night (3535) Bad night (1147) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead. http://tfl.nu/49y2
  Replies (14) Good night (1282) Bad night (5028) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank" (201): hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins http://tfl.nu/g5wh
  Replies (41) Good night (4354) Bad night (1213)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks? http://tfl.nu/fbfw
  Replies (8) Good night (1157) Bad night (2727) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door? http://tfl.nu/on5x
  Replies (8) Good night (4126) Bad night (807) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes. http://tfl.nu/xpl7
  Replies (7) Good night (926) Bad night (1748) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it. http://tfl.nu/pdw3
  Replies (5) Good night (440) Bad night (1104) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex?? http://tfl.nu/i4wa
  Replies (17) Good night (615) Bad night (2159) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics. http://tfl.nu/u5tf
  Replies (4) Good night (1151) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor. http://tfl.nu/6k19
  Replies (2) Good night (805) Bad night (198)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much http://tfl.nu/b8oh
  Replies (1) Good night (192) Bad night (555) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me http://tfl.nu/p7wy
  Replies (2) Good night (727) Bad night (157) Order T-Shirt

Randomize