she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
